"Life is just one damned thing after another."

"Five frogs are sitting on a log. Four decide to jump off. How many are left?

There are still five - because there's a difference between deciding and doing."

"Five Frogs On A Log" by Mark L Feldman & Michael F Spratt

but in this case, all of you all decided and did it, nothing i say can change it ya.

i dont know what to say..
Sorry Ms Ong, sorry to everyone who thinks i have offended them in my jovial/joker persona. teased you, laughed at you, bullied you. the feeling is so @(#*)*#*@@& when you want to change but so little people is behind you. Ms Ong, just cheer up, forget about the past, its the future that matters!

i dont want to be band major anymore, its tough, looking back i thought it was easy peasy lemon squeezy but i was wrong, i never put myself in the position of others, and i doubt others ever put my position in their shoes, forget it, just pull through SYF and youre done,
no more commitments.

i think the band sounded quite nice, that made me breathe again, this band might survive afterall.

its human nature, who wouldnt think of teasing/making others feel miserable just for them to feel good? and enjoy themselves? who wouldnt?! I WOULD LIKE TO UNGUILTLY SAY I WOULDNT BUT THE FACT IS THIS, I WOULD.

I just want to fufil my duties and responsibilities in studies and band, this is my job, i was selected to do it, so i should perform my duties,
also to shenghan, it is true you are not a good leader yet, but since the teachers have elected you, do your job, only by doing what your job is will people respect you. :D Im not scolding you or what just telling you, because im over here trying to self-improve too.

ever since i cam back from shenyang, term 3, i have not been doing my work and putting in effort. all slipshot works, even i am digusted at myself, trust people to call me SC, im disgraceful.
sometimes in band i take my time to do things because i am the leader and i can do what i want, thats just so selfish of me,\

i was deceiving myself afterall, what i thought wouldnt happen happened. forget it. i should just move on and get on with life, we shouldnt be thinking of negative things all the time.

"Hold yourself responsible for a higher standard than anybody else expects of you. Never excuse yourself. Never pity yourself. Be a hard master to yourself - and be lenient to everybody else."
American clergyman Henry Ward Beecher (1813-1887)

but how hard i come down to myself everytime, no one cares, whenever im lenient im taken advantaged of? i just hope i can end my journey in life,
i've never felt so stressed out before.

forget it, go on and laugh at me hahahahahahha i also dont know what im writing, -.-
just feel so fucked up ok sorry no more vulgarities for me, i just feel so stressed and everything comes piling on my head and its like some timebomb, might explode anytime 0.-||

nvm goodbye/

"Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed people can change the world. Indeed it is the only thing that ever has."
Anthropologist Margaret Mead (1901-1978)